I am British. Not only is that a factual statement about my heritage, but it’s a statement that’s loaded with a cartful of social and cultural connotations.
Before I moved to the United States, I didn’t realize what it truly means to ‘be British’. Now that I’m here, surrounded by Americans, living with Americans, going to class with Americans and hanging out with a handful of other Brits, I’m constantly reminded just ‘how British’ I am.
Last night I went to Tio’s and winced my way through drinking a margarita with salt instead of sugar. The waitress got the order wrong but the Brit inside me was too polite to send the drink back. Generally speaking, this is an extremely British thing to do.
We tell hairdressers that we are happy with awful haircuts while we are sat in the salon chair, crying inside and wondering how to get away with wearing a hat for the next month.
We enjoy expressing our strongest views through the wonderfully offhand mediums of sarcasm and irony. So to avoid causing offense, we find it difficult to turn down social invitations without giving an apologetic running commentary of all the reasons we are unable to attend.
Our sense of humor is, as many Americans will know from our increasingly popular TV shows, extremely dry, and we engage our friends in something affectionately known as ‘taking the piss’ on a daily basis.
Southern American comedian Reg D. Hunter hit the nail on the head when he said,
“You know, British people, y’all got a lot of subtext. Y’all like stuff like irony and sarcasm, tongue in cheek- you know, clever ways to be indirect about what you think. Sometimes a British person will insult me and it will take me three weeks to figure it out, man.”
Before I departed for my year at USC, the study abroad office told me that I might experience completely natural phases of ‘hostility’ towards my host culture. In a typically British fashion, I adopted a cynical view towards this prediction and vowed to enthusiastically embrace all aspects of American culture and never look back.
Seven months down the line, I’ve come to terms with the harsh truth that there are just some aspects of American speech and behavior that will bother me eternally.
First of all, y’all are pretty blunt. So blunt, in fact, that on numerous occasions I’ve started to wonder whether Americans actually like me. If ever I invite my American friends out for a lunch or drinks, sometimes they respond with simply “No.” Or I’ll say thank-you to someone for holding the door, and they’ll respond with a brief “Mmmhm. ”It’s taken me a while to realize that that’s just how you guys roll out here.
Another thing that startles me is that Americans tend to be louder, more vocal, and a lot more hyperbolic than us Brits. Where a British person might say, “I’m pretty chuffed with my mid-term results, yeah.”, an American would say, “Literally, I was SO shocked I made an A, like seriously I am so happy right now I could DIE.”
Finally, I must be terribly British and correct some aspects of American speech. Ending a sentence with the words “or no?” does not make grammatical sense. As is ending a sentence with the phrases, “I can’t”, and “I can’t even”. I spent at least a month asking numerous Americans, “you can’t what, sorry?” Note the obligatory apology there. Very British.
I am totally aware of how essentialist this all sounds. I know many Americans that are subtle and sarcastic, and lots of Brits that are loud and blunt. But having studied abroad in another country for seven months, these general Anglo-American differences have presented themselves loud and clear.
As much as these differences do, on occasion, make my inner Brit wince, embarrass me, and cause me to digress into a painful string of awkward English stuttering, something useful can be said for immersing myself in a highly vocalized and straightforward American culture.
The next time I have a terrible haircut (hopefully never) and the hairdresser asks me for my verdict, things are going to go a little differently. When he asks me if it looks okay, I’m going to say “No.” Then when he asks why, I’m going to shout, “I cannot even!” And I can assure you that any terribly British apologies from the salon will be met with a nonchalant “Mmmhm” and I will be giving excruciatingly honest feedback on my feedback form after my visit. Because that’s just how I roll now. Literally.