Everyone hears the stories of high school and college sweethearts, but what is behind it all? How does it work? And why doesn’t it work?
When you hear the clichéd story of high school or college love, you either “ooh” and “ahh”—out of either appreciation or jealousy—or sigh out of sickness, and more than likely start vomiting on sight. Relations gone wrong are now swimming in your head. Womp.
As humans, we are biologically programmed to seek a make—someone to spend the days with (both good and bad), laugh, start a family and be a best friend. In college, the possibilities seem endless; there are so many new people that we think, “This is where our story begins.” Or possibly, we think that we have already met that certain someone, and we think, “This is where our story will grow.”
There are quite a few factors that go into the equation of why relationships work in the first place. However, while in college, these factors must sharpen, modify, and exxagerate more than ever. This is because of the environment. When you have a significant other, going out on the town may not seem as fun, and going out without each other will a cause stress in the relationship. How do you trust someone when there are so many opportunities for it to go wrong?
Trust, compassion, empathy, humor, and many more emotions go into making two people come together in a romantic way. Without the fundamental building blocks, a relationship cannot survive. You must trust, you must be able to be empathetic and put yourself into your partner’s shoes.
What happens when it’s long distance? Not attending the same college may not be what kills a relationship. In fact, many couples are amazing at long distance! However, it becomes even more imperative that trust become the main pillar of the relationship; everything builds off of trust, and if it is lost, it is almost impossible to get back. Maturity also emerges as a pillar of the relationship because if one person cannot handle the idea of being exclusive, then the relationship becomes a ticking time bomb, where everyone involved gets hurt.
For the select few who make it through these trying years of college together, congratulations! However, for the rest of us who either haven’t tried, or have lost hope along the way because of hurt feelings, always continue to look. Do not close your heart to the possibility of love, because it will never come to you if you are not willing. And most importantly, laugh about it. These moments are fleeting and will all soon be memories, storied told at reunions and get-togethers or stored in the mind until our dying days. So, make mistakes, get hurt and never forget to laugh.