Gift exchanges are always fun, but the White Elephant variety is one of the best kinds. Creativity is a must when shopping for the perfect useless present, but if the holidays have you too frazzled to think, here are some suggestions that will make your gift a hit (or even better, a miss).
*TACKY PILLOWS* _Gift:_ "Zazzle":http://www.zazzle.com/custom_name_ugly_christmas_sweater_candy_canes_pillow-189868289635478235 The busy pattern on this festive pillow is guaranteed to clash with anyone’s sofa. It’s also customizable, which opens up a whole new level of opportunities. You can have it embroidered with a completely arbitrary word, like “microeconomics,” or the name of your favorite U.S. president like “Millard Fillmore.” However, at $37.95 plus shipping, it’s a bit on the pricy side.
_Thrift:_ To make pillows worthy of a White Elephant exchange, buy the tackiest one you can find. This felted masterpiece, complete with plastic snowflakes and fuzzy baubles, only costs $2.
*UNIQUE WALL ART* _Gift:_ "Cafepress":http://www.cafepress.com/sphynx_hairless_cat_large_poster,836931123 Most college students buy at least one poster in a half-hearted attempt to break up the cinderblock expanse of their dorm rooms. To increase the prank factor, deviate from Einstein quotes or black-and-white snapshots of Paris, and get something truly odd. This $20 print of a hairless Sphynx cat, complete with mood lighting, is exactly what your friend needs for that empty spot on the wall across from her bed.
_Thrift:_ Goodwill Is there anything more appropriate for a White Elephant gift exchange than “wolves howling at the moon” wall art? Strange wall art is easy to come by at thrift stores, and $1.75 is more than reasonable. Just be sure you don’t give in to the temptation to keep it for yourself.
*IRRELEVANT READING MATERIAL* _Gift:_ "Amazon":http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/159594480X/ref=as_li_tf_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=211189&creative=373489&creativeASIN=159594480X&link_code=as3&tag=bookfail-20 Some books are irrelevant no matter who receives them. No one needs this $12 volume on the exercise craze “Prancercise,” which is exactly why it’s the perfect choice.
_Thrift:_ Goodwill Thrift stores are sure to have low prices and unusual titles. Context is also key. For example, if the White Elephant exchange is among undergraduate college students, consider picking up a book on “The Houseplant Care Manual,” like this one (left), for about $1.
*RIVAL TEAM MERCHANDISE* _Gift:_ "Ebay":http://www.ebay.com/itm/CLEMSON-TOILET-SEAT-COVER-SET-/251638762070?pt=US_NCAA_Fan_Shop&hash=item3a96d6ca56 Take things to the next level with a toilet seat cover set for $19. Besides the nod to a rival team, toilet seat covers are one of the all-around most disappointing gifts to receive.
_Thrift:_ Goodwill Now is the time to exploit those deep-rooted feuds that live in every sports fan’s heart. Throw a $3.25 Clemson T-shirt into a gathering of diehard Gamecocks and enjoy.
